Just as we were losing hope, a chance conversation on Instagram led us to 'The Peace School' in Toronto. Our conversation with the co-founders of 'The Peace School' was a breath of fresh air.
In our family’s journey to find the right educational space for our 6-year-old daughter, we encountered numerous challenges and a few surprising revelations. Our daughter’s initial foray into public school was rough. She faced anxiety, confusion, and an environment that seemed to place a disproportionate emphasis on conformity. “The Learning Game” by Ana Lorena Fabrega speaks to the importance of customizing learning to a child’s individual needs. It was clear that our daughter’s needs were not being met in public school. In her book, Fabrega emphasizes the importance of curiosity-driven learning. She argues that traditional schools often suppress a child’s natural curiosity and instead impose a one-size-fits-all curriculum. As we experienced with our daughter, this approach can lead to anxiety and a lack of engagement. She told us that she was bored most of the time, at school. I can understand, Imagine, they ask you to sit quietly in one place, where they put you as far as they can, from the kids that you are closer to, and ask you to be quiet, not do anything until the instructions come your way, then you are given some practice, that is either above or below the optimal challenge for you. So, either it is too hard for you to understand, or too easy, and in both cases, you will be bored. There are few kids whose challenge match their level, and they are good kids according to the school’s standard.
The expectations around lunchtime were particularly hard for our daughter, who is a picky eater. She felt she was labeled as a ‘bad girl’ for not adhering to the prescribed rules around food, a stressor that seemed wholly unnecessary. The school’s system of punishment and reward further exacerbated her anxiety.
As we entered first grade, things deteriorated further. The space for free play was minimal, discipline was rigid, and there was a lack of tolerance for mistakes. This was reminiscent of Blake Boles’ critique of traditional schooling in his book “Why Are We Still Sending Our Kids to School?”. Boles argues that traditional schooling often undermines a child’s self-confidence, creativity, and capacity for self-direction. He advocates for alternatives like self-directed learning and unschooling. This echoed our own experience. Our daughter’s school seemed more interested in enforcing discipline and conformity than in nurturing her individual strengths and interests. We tried to make the space safe for her, but her teacher was unresponsive to our concerns and often referred us to the principal. It was clear that this was not the right environment for our daughter.
Our search for a private school that prioritized the learning journey over the end result was fruitless. We came across many that claimed to follow different approaches, such as Montessori, but they seemed to be just traditional schools under a different label. We finally found “Acton Academy”, but there were no branches in Toronto. In “Courage to Grow,” Sandefer describes the Acton Academy, a school that she co-founded, which takes a radically different approach to education. The model is based on guiding students to find their own ‘calling’ or passion and then equipping them with the skills and knowledge they need to pursue it. This philosophy resonated deeply with us. Our daughter, like any child, has unique interests that weren’t being catered to in her traditional school. However, we had no such options in Toronto.
We finally took her out of school and decided to homeschool her, while we were both working from home. The homeschooling community was vibrant and welcoming, but their events often clashed with our work schedule.
Just as we were losing hope, a chance conversation on Instagram led us to ‘The Peace School’ in Toronto. Our conversation with the co-founders of ‘The Peace School’ was a breath of fresh air. Their humanistic approach, emphasis on life skills, and rejection of a punishment and reward system aligned with our beliefs. It reminded us of Laura Sandefer’s “Courage to Grow,” which advocates for a child-centered, self-directed approach to learning. This was the kind of environment we wanted for our daughter.
Despite the long commute from Pickering to Thornhill, we were willing to make the sacrifice for our daughter’s happiness and well-being. It was a difficult journey, filled with many obstacles, but we finally found a place that understood and respected our daughter’s unique learning path.
The Peace School in Toronto, where we eventually enrolled our daughter, is a unique institution that we found to align closely with our own values and beliefs about education.
Central to the philosophy of The Peace School is the application of humanistic psychology to education. This means that the school values every voice and ensures it is heard, fostering a participatory educational environment deeply embedded in a culture of peace. Every time my daughter voices her opinion, I communicate that with the school, without being afraid of being labeled as a “demanding parent” like what I have experienced before. The peace school emphasizes that they want to hear from us. They are so educated and knowledgeable that every time I communicate any concerns, I learn an interesting and amazing solution to the problem. Basically, not only they are helping my daughter grow, but I am also growing with the school as a parent, and it is so enjoyable.
Their educational model recognizes the individuality of each child and emphasizes the importance of starting the educational journey from where the child is. It appreciates the varied starting points each child brings and customizes the educational process to cater to their specific needs, abilities, and talents. This individualized approach to education strongly resonated with us, as it was clear that our daughter was not receiving this level of attention in her previous schooling experiences.
The Peace School also places a high emphasis on life-centered education, creating links between education and the real world. By grounding education in this context, children develop a deeper understanding of the world around them and how their actions impact themselves and others. For example, they go on a lot of field trips, and every time, they need to buy their own bus tickets. They take the bus and aim for their destination. Sometimes they go shopping and they need to decide what they care to buy; with a certain amount of money they have. Sometimes they go to the movies, and again, they take the bus, and experience the whole journey, and take responsibility.
Additionally, the school’s goal of maximizing the potential of each child is achieved through providing engaging and supportive learning environments. These environments encourage children to fully explore their passions, talents, and abilities, which was a crucial factor in our decision to send our daughter there. Currently, my daughter has a teacher for each subject at school. She can choose to bring her creativity and projects to the class and the teacher tries to use that project towards her learning. She is receiving individual training and interacts with kids who are not necessarily the same age as hers. She is still transitioning from the traditional school to this free environment. The most important thing I care for her to relearn is to be comfortable with making mistakes. As Ana Lorena Fabrega emphasizes in her book, “The Learning Game”, how crucial it is for a kid to learn that mistakes are the path to success.
The Peace School understands the vital role of meaningful interactions in a child’s life, especially interactions with other human beings. This is reflected in their educational approach, which acknowledges the importance of imparting meaning to these interactions and helping children develop strong interpersonal skills, empathy, and a sense of connection with the world. Just as one example, when my daughter entered the Peace School, she was afraid of the word “principal office”. Every day at The Peace School, she enters the school, is greeted by her principal or one of his family members, and leaving the school, they are there to say goodbye to her. At some point, she and her friend were thinking of changing their principal title to something else, because they thought the name principal was not fair for such kind-hearted people. But today, I feel the meaning has changed in their mind, as I hope for my daughter to unlearn many other things from her traditional school, and relearn them here, at The Peace School.
Furthermore, the school’s educational approach goes beyond mere knowledge transfer. It encompasses a wide range of experiences that empower children and adolescents to gain profound life insights. This is achieved through immersive experiences and dynamic activities that cultivate essential skills and foster meaningful connections. Just yesterday, parents were invited to the “Snow White” show that was designed by the kids with the help of their wonderful art teacher. They had created a lot of characters and the whole room was set up for the show using anything you could think of. Papers, egg box, fiber, yarn. It was amazing to watch how they enjoyed the whole process.
In conclusion, The Peace School’s commitment to providing education beyond textbooks and its emphasis on real-world engagement and hands-on learning resonated deeply with us. By encouraging active participation, the school equips students with critical thinking and problem-solving skills, as well as the ability to navigate diverse experiences. These fundamental principles aligned closely with our own beliefs about education, making The Peace School the ideal choice for our daughter. 